DaRkNess

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

!!!!!!!!! 5 ways to improve eq haha.......veri sad......... but needa noe..........

Knowing one’s own emotions

Recognize and name emotions you feel; understand why you feel that way; and distinguish between feelings and actions. “As a parent, you can begin now with your children, teaching them about their emotions. But first you have to know your own. You have to be able to tell yourself what you’re feeling,” Kilgore said.

Motivating oneself

When considering how to productively harness your feelings, practice some emotional self-control and delay gratification, Kilgore advises. Stanford University researchers tested children’s impulse control by placing a marshmallow in front of them and telling them that they would receive a second one if the first remained when the adult leading the group, who needed to leave the room, returned.
The longitudinal study found that, overall, the children who delayed gratification and did not eat the marshmallow were more successful later in life—as measured by a range of factors including happiness, income and job satisfaction—than those children who ate the marshmallow.

Recognizing emotions in others

The ability to take another person’s perspective, Kilgore said, is a skill that effective managers and supervisors possess. Emotionally intelligent individuals also are sensitive to other people’s feelings and listen well. Kilgore led workshop participants through an exercise designed to illustrate these ideas. She showed two emotionally charged clips from the movies Parenthood and E.T., asking individuals to write down emotions they saw exhibited by the characters’ body language. Participants also wrote down their own feelings during each scene. The group’s list demonstrated the many emotions seen through the films’ characters, as well as the different ways people felt about the same scenes.
Parents also can help their children connect feelings with labels so they can express them more effectively.

Managing emotions

Accept your feelings, but find a balance between over sensitivity or over expression and emotional suppression. Kilgore said her teenage daughters, when angry, have sometimes stomped up the stairs in their home. While some people may find this behavior unacceptable, Kilgore said she finds it healthy for them to express their emotions rather than suppressing them.

Handling relationships

Being perceptive, applying conflict management skills instead of ignoring conflict, and being considerate and cooperative are part of maneuvering relationships from an emotionally intelligent perspective. Kilgore also stresses that communication skills are essential to healthy relationships. She suggests that individuals practice using “I” statements more often when describing feelings.

http://www.umich.edu/~urecord/9900/May22_00/15.htm

DArkneSs*
4:02 PM